Saturday, January 16, 2010

Soul Sucking Sellout

Ok, I don't think my readers (haha) are stupid enough to take me literally, but just in case you are, in fact, completely retarded allow me to disclaimer: I did not make a pact with the Devil, per se. But the devil is in the details.

Birmingham has been good to me. I've been able to pay my bills on time, every month which, to me is freakin' awesome! What can I say? I'm a simple person with simple pleasures.

I don't really know anybody here. And, like millions of other citizens of the free world, my job prospects were becoming...erm...slim to none. Sure, we were making some money with our business, but it was subsidized by my unemployment, which is set to run out in May of this year. (Additional disclaimer for the assholes at the unemployment office: when I say "our business" I really mean "my mate's business" because I certainly don't hang drywall or set toilets so keep your greedy fucking paws off of my unemployment check!)

Not that I'll be needing it much longer.

Hey, man, I got a job! A good job. A kick-ass oh-my-god-I'll-never-have-to- worry-about-starving-to-death-ever-again job.

In a true "it's not what you know but whom" fashion, a hot shit friend of my mother's from California randomly moved to Birmingham to run the firm down the street.

Hell yes, I called him. Hell yes, he's a bit of a devil. Hell yes, I sold my soul.

Cha-ching!

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