Saturday, January 23, 2010

Soul Sucking Suck

In my last post, I appeared to be happy to get this upcoming opportunity. Sure it comes with shitty hours and a lot of stress but the money is...erm, unreliable. But when the money is there, it's damn good money. So why, almost 2 weeks before I start am I suddenly having panic attacks? I haven't even set foot in the place yet (to work) and already I'm at risk for a heart attack and/or stroke.

Seriously, my blood pressure is through the roof! I have a headache, I cry at the drop of a hat, I'm having shooting pains in my left arm, heart palpitations and my heart and soul are screaming, "NnnnoooOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!"

If I don't take this job I'll feel like a loser. If I do take this job... well, I already fucking hate it. Enough said there.

I honestly do not know what to do. But I just might follow my heart on this one. I just might.

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